Another day gone bye...

...and another tomorrow. There was some new writing here from me but I deleted it. I'm kind of bummed over it because I didn't think to save it and to be honest, I think it was kinda good. I do that, ya know... I write. In case you haven't realized it yet, I like to write. When I am stressed, I write. Happy? I write. Sad? Depressed? You guessed it... I tend to write. Its like an escape for me. A release. Some of it is great! Some... well maybe not so great but the bottom line is that it comes from my heart. How do you express whats in yours?

Fact is that I have made some mistakes in my life. I guess we all do that sort of thing but I maybe have made a few more than some. Maybe I'm just being hard on myself but I cant help but have thoughts of how things may have been if I had made different choices in life. The real sad part is this...
Even knowing what I do now, I doubt that I would change very much. I mean... my choices have made me who I am today, right? All in all I know in my heart that I am a good person and I realize that much of that comes from my experiences in life, along with the way I was raised by my parents. So logically thinking, had I made different choices, I would not be who I am right now. Looking past my feelings at the moment, I know that I like who I am and how I think. I know how to treat someone and take pleasure in that. I know how to touch someone... and not just physically... I mean really touch someone's soul and care for it. Is this not a good trait? Is this desirable? Honestly it doesn't matter. It is to me and that is all that counts right now.

I tend to think so differently than most people I know. Sometimes I cant understand the motivations of some people. I can accept that and I always know my limitations. I respect people for who they are. Just be genuine with me and you will have my respect and friendship. I don't require much, I swear. Why is it so hard to understand that?

I must keep looking to the future. The past is full of sorrow. Don't get me wrong... it was not all bad. I had a great childhood with a great family and parents who loved me more than I can realize... but the recent past has been plagued with tragedy. Just look back into my blog and you can see the worst of it. But tomorrow must hold a promise for me. Tomorrow the sun will rise again and a new page will be written. Things change in life. A sad fact but one no one is immune too. Sometimes there are people in your life that you always assumed that you would know forever who just are no longer there anymore. Life is funny like that. If I can teach anyone anything in life its this...
Hold close to you the people who mean so much because there will come a day that they are no longer there. Death took my father. Circumstance took others. Always remember that nothing lasts forever so hold on tight and I pray that at the end of the day you can look back with a smile knowing how lucky you were to have been touched so deeply.

Monday I am taking a day off from work. I have to go take a test for a job I applied for. Trish is going to be my cheering section. She also took the day off to come with me. Maybe things will get better from that point on. Trish is a great girl but we started things off kind of fast and again things got in the way. I don't know where we are going but right now things are OK.

Isn't life funny? If life is like the ocean, then we are the beach. Sometimes the tide is high... sometimes its not. Just how high is the tide today? How low?
Back when Ronald Reagen was running for his second team in office, he had an add campaign. The one commercial I will always remember was the one where it said "Its morning in America" Look it up if you have the chance. It is amazing and poignant. For me, its morning again.